Why I Don't Like To Go To Church

This is not about me who doesn't like to go to church ever because that is not the case.  I like going to church.  This is just about what i feel at the moment - not motivated.  I am not motivated to go to church just the same as I am not motivated to write about it.  I am still in contact with my friends at the church, my pastor and his wife, and most of the time when we get to see each other, they invite me to go to church.   There are times that i said yes to them, but most of the time i just ignored them.

Why Am I Not Motivated To Go To Church?

I've been asked by some friends why I have not attended church service for sometime already and I had asked myself that question too.  Is it me, or is it the church?  Most of the alibis I gave were not really true and i know that they knew that also.  I have not given up on my faith and i have no intention of doing so in my lifetime and even in the afterlife if I still have to make a choice. 

I tried to checked on the things around me including myself to determine what really demotivated me to go to Church:

The Pastor

I have been very objective about people in pulpit.  I respected them not because of what they are, of what they know and can do, but because they are ordained by God.  They are chosen by God to be the leader of the church and pastor His flocks.  Have that mindset, whoever is the pastor of the church, he has my respect and i will always be humbled by their work.  Even though i knew that the pastor is not doing what he preaches, i will understand.  He is not that different from me and with many others, we usually don't do what we think is right.  We usually do what we think we must do.  So, the pastor is not the reason why I am not motivated to go to church.

The Teachings

There was one time when I almost quit going to church because of the teaching.  Well, not really quit going to church but planning to go to another church.  I have been very watchful with what is being taught in the pulpit.  I know what I believe and I know where I stand, so when things become questionable, i reason.  But this is not the case as of this time why I don't like to go to church.  If there are things that i don't fully agree at the moment, i just park it somewhere in my mind and then get back to it when I find something that supports or contradicts to it.   Although, I wish the pastor is sensitive enough with the needs of the flock and be able to feed them with the right kind of food at the right time.

The People In The Church

Certainly not them.  Actually the love relationships among church members are the glue that holds the church from crumbling.  I like all the people in the church.  They are the biggest consideration I had before when I planned to go to another church.  They are not the reason why i don't like to go to church.

The Distance

Silly me.  I should I include this one.

The Church Building

We don't have a church building.  We are still dreaming-hoping-praying to have one.  We are renting a room at the third floor of a commercial building in the downtown area adjacent to a mall.  Yup, what a very nice location, but I don't want to talk about where to go after church, i am still looking at why I don't like to go to church.  We have comfortable seats and the room is air-conditioned.  The room is very comfortable - to sleep sometimes ;) (this reminds me of the story of the taxi driver and the pastor).

What else?  If the pastor, the teachings, the people in the church, the distance and the church building are not the reasons why I don't like to go to church, then what?  Me, really?  Are you serious?

My Relationship With God

As I said, I have not given up my faith and not ever planning to give up on it.  I still believe everything about God and the all the things i learned about Him.  He is still God, my Lord and Savior.  It probably has something to do with my personal relationship with Him and I don't want to write about my personal relationship with God at the moment.