Doing The Thing Minus The Lust
I won’t be asking whether self-stimulation is a sin. I will leave that question to those people who like to debate and share their insights about it. The Bible is silent about it. Although, there is a single verse/incident in the Bible that it was done and was regarded unclean, but it was referred to the motive or intent of the person doing it and not the deed. This is not also an issue about being addicted to it to the point that it already destroys the person doing it. What intrigued me is about self-stimulation without lusting. Can you really masturbate without lusting?
I have read several opinions and posts in books and in the internet about doing it without lusting. But the information is sort of one sided because most of the people who said "it can be done" were Christians. I am not really sure if it is possible or they were just making it up to get away from the word “lust”.
Many Christians and even theologians said that doing it without fantasy is not sinful and that it is a normal part of most males’ lives growing up. They found it as a much better alternative to doing so while lusting. I don’t have a question about it being biologically normal, but the possibility of doing it with an empty mind intrigues me.
One person shared about setting goals for a number of days (7 days) without giving in to the temptation of doing it and then does it without fantasy at the end. He said that he was able to do it without fantasizing; however, lustful thought did pop up in his head every now and then. Having experienced that, another question did pop up in his mind. Will these lustful thoughts go away by experience? Meaning, it is normal for lustful thoughts to pop up when you’re a novice and will never happened if you mastered the technique. Sigh!
Another person also shared that if we have the discipline needed to keep our mind stray from lustful thoughts while masturbating he believe that it is perfectly normal to do.
Many people agree that self-stimulation get rid of their horniness but other said that masturbation makes them horny. This is now a question of which comes first, the egg or the chicken. Some people view it as not a bad thing as long as you treat it right and do it in moderation. How do we treat it right? And what’s moderation? Going back to the first question: Is it really possible?
I have read several opinions and posts in books and in the internet about doing it without lusting. But the information is sort of one sided because most of the people who said "it can be done" were Christians. I am not really sure if it is possible or they were just making it up to get away from the word “lust”.
Many Christians and even theologians said that doing it without fantasy is not sinful and that it is a normal part of most males’ lives growing up. They found it as a much better alternative to doing so while lusting. I don’t have a question about it being biologically normal, but the possibility of doing it with an empty mind intrigues me.
One person shared about setting goals for a number of days (7 days) without giving in to the temptation of doing it and then does it without fantasy at the end. He said that he was able to do it without fantasizing; however, lustful thought did pop up in his head every now and then. Having experienced that, another question did pop up in his mind. Will these lustful thoughts go away by experience? Meaning, it is normal for lustful thoughts to pop up when you’re a novice and will never happened if you mastered the technique. Sigh!
Another person also shared that if we have the discipline needed to keep our mind stray from lustful thoughts while masturbating he believe that it is perfectly normal to do.
Many people agree that self-stimulation get rid of their horniness but other said that masturbation makes them horny. This is now a question of which comes first, the egg or the chicken. Some people view it as not a bad thing as long as you treat it right and do it in moderation. How do we treat it right? And what’s moderation? Going back to the first question: Is it really possible?
Hi Elyong, I've been struggling with the same problem recently, and am not one hundred percent sure myself. I think that self stimulation may be possible without lusting, however lusting almost always seems to come into self stimultion at some point. God hates sin and lusting is a sin, therefore it is much better to not self stimulate. I know that at first this seems almost impossible, but see if you can. If you screw up, then God will forgive you as long as you try not to give in again. Even if self stimulation is not bad, we should still be able to control when and how much we do it (such as never) because of the fruit of the spirit self control which come from being a christian. Try memorizing scripture to tell yourself when you are tempted to lust and self stimulate. Think about and act on the things which trigger you to self stimulate, e.g. sleep with your door open, don't watch tv late at night, tell someone you are only going to have a five minute shower etc. A very good book has been written on the subject by Joshua Harris called 'Sex is not the problem (Lust is)'
ReplyDeleteAll I can say one can not do the act I guess without thinking or fantasizing about someone. I have not seen or heard of anyone doing the act and just starring off to the ceiling and getting it done right away. Doing it is half mental and physical work imagination is one key to make such thing work so I think no one would just sit there do it and have a blank head. Man is a rational being I think he would not just do it like a machine just for the sake of it.
ReplyDeleteI don't think fantasizing while masturbating is a sin. fantasy is a spice of self stimulation. masturbasting without fantasizing is just like singing without thinking of the lyrics of the song while singing. come on get real! masturbate...fantasize...enjoy!
ReplyDeleteHi guys, thank you for your opinions and comments. To the first anonymous, yes i have the book of Joshua Harris, it's a very good and practical book. To the second anonymous, for now i can agree with you. I haven't done it without anything in my mind. To the third anonymous, as i have posted above, i am not asking whether it is a sin or not. I was just wondering if it can be done without fantasizing or lusting.
ReplyDeleteThis is what I can say. Masturbation, which of course entails ejaculation prevents life from becoming. That's a mockery of pro-creation which God intended within the married life. It is impossible to masturbate without thinking of lustful thoughts. These thoughts stimulate and causes erection. Without these thoughts, it would be impossible to get satisfaction. In one way or the other, lustful thoughts will be injected. Lastly, think about this: Will you be comfortable masturbating in the presence of your parents? more so with God watching? If not,then it's probably not right.
ReplyDeleteMaybe self-flagelating while doing it would help?
ReplyDeleteYes, I know I am being a smart a**. However, why is it that christians feel so obsessed with controlling sex and how to express it?
Don't you think that God gave you this ability to fantasize and enjoy sex for a reason? If not, what is the point of giving it to you? To torture you and make you miserable through your life? I refuse to believe that.
If the ability to create fantasy is there, it is there for a reason. It is the way it was intended from the beginning. Supressing it (and yes, it is possible) is going against your own nature and at the end that only creates more anguish and disfunction in your personality. I don't think that God wants that.
And, of course, lust is not a good thing either. I think the question for me would be how to distinguish between lust and a healthy amount of sexual desire. I believe that lust is an uncontrollable desire for sex that interferes with your normal functioning as a person.
When things get to that point then indeed you better look for help. But you see, God does not have to tell me this. I already know that if anything is so out of hand that it interferes with me then I do need help, or don't you?. Just my two cents.
Hi Zach, thank you for posting. I also believe that sexual desire is part of what has God has given when He created us but lusting is a different thing. Lust is more like an intense desire or craving for self gratification with something or someone not yours or should not be yours... but not limited to it.
ReplyDelete"God hates sin and lusting is a sin"
ReplyDeleteFirst part is correct, second part is wrong. You can lust after your wife and thats not a sin. Definitely NOT.
LETS LOOK AT THIS AS A WAY GOD LOOKS AT IT HE KNOWS ALL SEES ALL ,AND THE FLESH THE DEVIL AND THIS WORLD WAR AGAINST US DAILY,STOP FEEDING THEM WITH YOU,GOD WANTS HIS CHURCH PURE AND HOLY,NOT TOUCHING ,LOOKING OR FEEDING THE MIND WITH THE IMPURITYS THAT HINDER US FROM BEING MEN OF GOD.AND DON'T THINK SATIN DOES NOT SEE U AND REPORT TO GOD WHAT U ARE DOING!!!
ReplyDeleteLETS JUST RENEW OUR MINDS ALL SIN STARTS THERE IF WE THINK WITH THE MIND OF CHRIST AND WE WANT TO GLORIFY HIM IN OUR BODIES ,AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST IF CHRIST WALKED IN YOUR ROOM AND SAW YOU WHAT WOULD HE SAY,HE WAS TEMPTED BY EVERYTHING WE HAVE BEEN TEMPTED BY IF THAT DOES NOT FREE YOU,WHAT WILL THE SPIRIT BEARS WITNESS WITH THE TRUTH
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteKEN4CRIST you can only be tempted to sin. Masturbation isn't a sin. The only thing you have to do is wash up when your done according to laws handed down by God himself Deut. 25, 5-7. Natural desire is also not a sin. We can not continue to play Holy and not look deeper into these text for their meanings. If a person believes it is a sin that is fine but do not tell people that it is when the Bible makes no claim of such. Renewing our minds has nothing to do with becoming asexual.
ReplyDeleteIf any man has an emission of semen, then he shall wash all his body in water, and be unclean until evening. And any garment and any leather on which there is semen, it shall be washed with water, and be unclean until the evening. Also, when a woman lies with a man, and [there is] an emission of semen, they shall bathe in water, and be unclean until evening. -Leviticus 15:16-18 (NKJV).
Notice the first section of this passage doesn't mention sex until the very end.
Lust is covetness. Matthew 5:28 is mistranslated and is about married women. Desire for a single woman is not lust. Lust is not a word having to do with sex, that is only a part of it.
"One person shared about setting goals for a number of days (7 days) without giving in to the temptation of doing it and then does it without fantasy at the end. He said that he was able to do it without fantasizing;"
ReplyDelete-this is so true.. I have tried this a hundred times and it's guilt free.. Worth the time and pleasure
@anonymous, that is interesting...
ReplyDeleteboth urine and sperm come out from the same opening while urination one had no pleasure deriving from it - while ejaculating semen has in fact has this sensation not comparable with urinating - so it is the sensation that drives the person of doing it again and again - it does not matter whether one had lust or not - it is the sensation that ejaculation brings that made them do it. the question now to be ask is this - are you to sucumb to the sensation ejaculation gives?
ReplyDelete